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What About Socialization?~Part 4

Kids plaingSocial Learning Begins at Home

One of the social maladies that is killing our culture is age segregation. School and related activities—deemed so necessary for a “well-rounded education”—separate kids by age, effectively separating them not only from their parents but their siblings too, for the bulk of their waking hours. Then the church, with its age-graded classes and activities adds to the isolation. We don’t really go to church together any more. That old institution called family time has just about withered into oblivion in America.
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What To Do With Boys~ Part 3

BoysIt’s no secret that boys quarrel with both their brothers and their sisters. Most of the issues that cause or enhance sibling conflicts apply regardless of the sex of the combatants. In my presentation, Raising Cain Without Killing Abel, I discuss several cases of sibling rivalry in Scripture and what parents can do about the causes of it. In all those cases, it’s plain that the issues involved could easily cause conflict between siblings whether they were of the same or opposite sexes. Briefly, here are a few examples: Cain and Abel, Genesis Chapter 4: The root is an unresolved conflict between Cain and God. Cain tries to deal with God on his own terms, is rejected and takes out his bitterness on Abel. Read More…

Hey, Little Buddies ~ A Word to the Wise, Timing can be Everything

Its-Unlce-RickHey, little buddies!
I was reading in Proverbs this morning and I came across a familiar verse.

It was Proverbs 27:14: He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, It will be reckoned a curse to him.

In other words, if you want to tell a friend how much you appreciate him, don’t wake him up early in the morning to do it. He won’t appreciate your kind words as much as he resents being awakened from a comfortable sleep. He’ll be as unhappy with you as if you had cursed him instead of pronouncing a blessing on him.

This is just one example of why it’s important to use wise timing in speaking to others. When you have something you really want to say, it’s easy to forget that the person you want to talk to may not be ready to hear you right now. The person may be busy, talking to someone else, distracted or not feeling well. There are lots of times when it’s better to wait than to speak as soon as you think of something to say.

Remember, it’s not just what you say. It’s also how you say it, to whom you say it, with what tone of voice you say it and when you say it.



Planting Flowers In The Snow? ~ It’s Uncle Rick!

Wednesday-Its-Unlce-Rick-flowerssnowHey, little buddies!

Proverbs 15:2 says, “The tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable, But the mouth of fools spouts folly.

Did you know that it’s not only what you say, but how you say it, that can make all the difference in how people listen to you?

For instance, what if your little sister came to you and said she had just planted some flowers in the garden. But it’s January and 20 degrees outside! She asks if you think they will grow. What do you say?

You could say, “No, you dumb little kid! They’ll freeze to death in this weather!”

But that wouldn’t be a good answer at all. You would only hurt her feelings and discourage her from trying new things in the future. She will also be much slower to come to you and ask for your advice in the future. She won’t want to be called a dumb little kid again. Nobody likes that.

But you could say, “You know, I don’t think this is the time of year that people usually plant flowers, but let’s watch them each day and see how they do.” She will very quickly learn that January is the wrong time for planting flowers, so there’s a lesson learned. Better, she will learn it without big brother or sister making her feel stupid.

Answer wisely.

Speak wisely to others and you will make knowledge acceptable. People will like talking to you and they will listen to your advice if you speak with wisdom and kindness. You will not only pass on knowledge but you will make it acceptable to them.



Follow Their Dreams, Until… ~ Mondays with Marilyn

Mondays-w-Marilyn-(project)When you see an interest crop up in one of your children, find the resources needed for them to pursue it.

Make it a part of their “curriculum” and let them pursue what sparks their interest. Maybe they’ll be immensely interested in something for a while and then lose interest and go on to something else as some of my kids did. That’s okay. Their interests will be broadened that way.

Never feel like you have to stick to the traditional school subjects.

Life is so much more varied than the average school curriculum.




What to do When Kids Don’t Get Along

arguingGod has created the family to be the training ground for children. Since we are all born with a sin nature, righteous behavior doesn’t come naturally. Therefore, it is our primary job as parents to train our kids to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul, and mind. That awesome job requires intentional time put into training them to look to Scripture as the practical guidebook for their lives that supplies them with principles to follow and answers to every dilemma they will face. Read More…